To the whiney bitches of the world, collectively and singularly, I say to thee a right royal Fuck Off...

People know I'm rude, nasty, cold hearted, abusive - I'm the embodiment of everything undesirable about males who don't actually go out and inflict physical damage on others or their property.

So I can have civilised conversations which invariably involve the following phrases: I'm single. I'm not looking for a relationship. I loathe all that cutesy pie namby pamby shite, teddy bears and all the bovex associated with Kleenex ads.

And just because I don't (or didn't) go off and abuse [SHE] in this or another conversation, she suddenly thinks she's the exception to the rule, the one who can crack this tough exterior. To her surprise, she finds I'm not impressed and one foot wrong, one word out of place and the icy blast is going to be turned on her just as it is turned on every other dumb bimbo who crosses the bounds of commonsense and my predilection for misogyny.

I told you, I've been telling you as long as you've known me. I'm single, I'm staying that way, I don't want no relationship with someone who is going to expect me home for dinner, who is going to iron my shirts and tut tut because I'm not eating right.

Did you actually have the gaul to think you were going to change me? Change ME???

So, you were on the receiving end of something you found contradicted this stupid idea you've been harbouring that underneath the rough tough exterior, I'm really a sweet guy and you're all hurt and offended. Would it have paid you to remember those sage words I told you when you first started talking to me? I'm a bastard. I have no heart and you can't change me because I don't want to change.

So then what happens?

She runs off and gossips to her friends who all know me as well that I'm some kind of bastard and the shit starts flying in every fucking direction.

Did I ever tell ANYONE anywhere that I'm anything BUT a bastard or an arsehole?

Did I ever at any stage invite you to become emotionally attached to me? No, I most certainly did not.

If you play with fire, you get burnt. Simple. Don't think you are any different from anyone else. You're not.

If you think you can make me change by withdrawing yourself from me and telling EVERYONE that I'm such a bastard, that I lead you on only to turn on you later, you are mistaken.

I am your second to worst nightmare. I am the one who, when he says doesn't give a shit, actually means it.

I came to the internet with no net friends. I found plenty. If you fuck off and start gossipping and telling everyone about me, I don't care. Everytime you say "ChatRat" somewhere on the internet, my identity get's a kick along in the search engine rankings. Talk about me as much as you like, the more you do, the more people realise I am exactly what I say I am. A cold-hearted bastard.

So, new on ChatRat's list of the emotionally damned and terminally stupid are:

Ka-silly-lilly, self proclaimed crone of blogdom - for actually having the stupidity to take on Rageboy at all, and not knowing he has associates who possibly care even less than he does that people like you exist. Know thine enemy, Lily. And know also that there is nothing whatsoever you can do or say to anyone that has the slightest negative impact on me whatsoever.

Silly-Kimi, 26 year old psychotherapist and seriously insane dropkick bitch from hell - not only for possibly losing your home and what-all else on account of a teenage guy who lives on the other side of the planet, but for ACTUALLY relating this contemptible story of your own loss to ME ---- AFTER I told you what a stupid bitch you are in the first place. You actually deserve an award for your stupidity, Kim. It ranks right up there with the very best of them.


**********************IMPORTANT MESSAGE*****************************

People think I'm angry when I write screeds like this. They have this absurd notion that all is not well, that the cause of all this apparent angst is goings on which really have nothing to do with me or are inconsequential and I should just get over it.

To them, I simply have to reiterate, I don't care what you think.

I'm not angry, I enjoy this. It makes me feel more superior than I usually feel and I feel pretty damn superior most of the time.

So, you either marvel at my skill with a sharp word or you shut the fuck up and keep your opinions to yourself.

If I get something wrong, if I have the wrong end of the stick, or I seem to have misjudged the situation, see the above point.

Where do you go when your major interest - the one with the subcribing audience - Topica.com fucks up?

You come here and blog. That's what blogs are for after all...

I mean WHO in their right minds actually subscribes anywhere any more to get emails?

It's hard enough getting people to visit your website you know the one:



Sheesh... I know that's going to look awful if Blogger doesn't convert that html for you, but we live in hope.

I'd totally forgotten what I wrote a week ago about that black spot thing.
Not that it really mattered, no graffiti artists have done it and emailed me to tell me about it.

Ho hum... does anyone read blogs any more or are they all just preoccupied with message boards where they can tell the owner or hosts to go jump if something doesn't suit them?

I read Rageboy's blog from time to time. (I do prefer the EGR mailouts though). I hate visiting someone's website and all you get is links away from their website. Is that just me or does anyone else find that too? Links around the site are fine, links away from it just strike me as a waste of time.

If this is not how you feel and you have a website of your own, feel free to visit the batcave, rip the masthead and put it up as a link in your own site. I don't mind. You can always tell people you have some seriously insane friends and one in particular has started making demands... you know, put the link up or I'll drive my Winabago through your fishpond - crap like that.

What is it with internet personas?

Why do a few people find it necessary to have 20928204683502975 different nicknames or identities IN THE ONE SITE?

Want to see what I mean?

Check out the member list of an msn community called philosophy and absurdity...



It shouldn't take you long to find out who wins the schizoid of the year award. For that matter, it shouldn't take long to work out the runner up either.

You wanna find me? You look for ChatRat... that simple.

I worry about people who come on the internet with that many different identities. Once you get to know who's behind all of them, you understand why they do it and it has nothing to do with anything worthwhile. It's madness. Pure and simple. These different identities belonging to the same person respond to their own messages. True! I think I may start being rude to one of those identities and feign ignorance. Madness I tell you.

Megalomania is one thing and I can fully understand and appreciate that. After all, it's my form of mental illness!

But this pseudo schizophrenia? Bleh.. forget it.

Oh well.. it's late, I'm tired and I'm going to bed.

If you've read this far, you may as well keep reading. See if you can find out something interesting.

Let me know if you do.

I suppose I'd better actually do something here again, it has been over a month now since I bothered.

I'm busy at the website, dammit.

I love a good paradox, don't you? Ever been to Adbusters.org? A link from their site will lead you to unbrandamerica.com which gives birth to a new paradox. Actually it's an old paradox with a new slant. Well, it's not even an old paradox with a new slant, it's just your run of the mill paradox.

It's a campaign by people fed up with pop-culture (whatever the hell that means) to put black spots on major advertising icons like Coca Cola and Nike and any other famous brand with a billboard somewhere. The idea is to get us all to think like individuals! Stop being led like sheep at the behest of the advertisers! Be subversive and tell the whole world you're not going to play their game any more!!

Listen to US!! We won't lead you astray ;)

It's all in the name of subversion.

Can you see the paradox forming right before your eyes or am I just being paranoid?

It gave me an idea though... My internet persona is the Rat. ChatRat to be nomenclaturatively correct, but Rat will do just fine.

I'd like to send a message to any and all graffiti artists all over the planet to try to outdo themselves putting RAT all over the place. Whether it's a tag or a full on work of art, I want to see RAT everywhere.

The idea is, if graffiti artists and taggers put their own tags all over the place, the authorities take photographs and stow those pics away for use as evidence if the perpetrator gets caught. That way they can be charged for each individual tag or bit of graffiti they have done.

Now, if all of them tagged or did a stirling bit of art with RAT as the theme, it'll lead back to me. And it's just not possible for me to have been in all those places at once. It must therefore be a movement, a conspiracy - and I'll gladly take the rap for that!

The bozos in their little plastic boxes will try to lay the blame for the actual "vandalism" on me and failing with that little charge, they won't be able to get me in court for it again. What's more, I will have no idea at all who is doing it so they won't be able to charge me with aiding and abetting, conspiracy or any other bullshit charge.

Incitement to commit an offence? Possibly, but they're going to have a hard time doing that as well.

The message to the plastic box people is simple - We're withdrawing our support of your stupid ideas and replacing it with NOTHING! That's right, we don't have any political message at all, except to say that we're no longer listening to yours.

We're saying to advertisers that we're listening to each other, not you. We laugh at your efforts to make us believe what you want us to believe, buy what you want us to buy, do what you want us to do. Our message to you is NOTHING. We don't have a message for you. We're too busy doing what we want to do even to bother thinking about you.

The bricks in the wall might be yours, but the message on the wall is ours and our message is that you can't stop us from saying what we want to say.

Taggers and graffiti artists everywhere - Go the RAT! Put RAT tags and art all over the place. Take pics of your work and send them to me - chatrat@graffiti.net

Let them try to blame me for a world wide campaign of shut the fuck up and listen for a change.

The writing has been on the wall for thousands of years - now it's going to have a voice. How loud the voice depends on how many RATs are visited upon the cities throughout the world.

Visit the Batcave and leave your mark there... http://chatrat.batcave.net

See what it's all about and don't become a part of it. Instead, see what it's all about and DO LIKEWISE. Be different from it, apart from it and in support of its ideals. Don't be a follower, be a co-author. Don't say what I'm saying, don't even do what I do, just see what CAN be said and see what CAN be done and SAY and DO what YOU want to say and do. Get it?

My message is "You can have your own message"

Well, the website is happening apace again...

All the updates and necessary interactivity is up and running and growing by the week.
Since I know you're all just bursting to have a look at it, here's the url:

http://chatrat.batcave.net

Well, if you were hanging on "until tomorrow" like my last post said, and it's now more than 6 months since I was last here, SORRY!

I've been busy doing other things and blogger has been giving me a hard time as far as publishing this blog goes.
It seems the outside world can't get anything more than what I put up about 12 months ago now.

If this post happens to make it, nobody is going to know what the hell I've been talking about all this time.
Then again, that's nothing unusual.

Anyway, go check out the website and tell me what you think of it. There are plenty of bits and pieces you can use on board to do that, you don't have to resort to emailing me.

Ok, that's it for me for the time being... I'm going back to tinker with bits and pieces.

Toodle pip.

Perhaps the comedy career is going to actually eventuate this year. If I had more than 5 minutes to tell you all about it, I would. But I haven't so there. I'll be back tomorrow though, so you won't have long to wait.