Sunday, October 02, 2005

Today I remembered my little brother.

It's his birthday tomorrow week. If he were still alive, he would be 25. I still love him and miss him.

My brother Christopher Robert who had so little, who was so much and who lived so briefly. My beautiful little brother Christopher who gave so much, who touched so many and when the last days came was almost all alone. Hundreds knew him, 6 of us were left at the end.

My awesome little brother who taught me so much as he also learned from me, gave me strength as he took strength from me and loved me as unconditionally as I loved him. Fate never blessed anyone as it did me with Christopher, my wonderful, awesome, beautiful little brother.

I love you so much, bro.

4 comments:

Chameleon Farriss said...

Hi Paul...

From November 2003 to the present day - I'm understanding more and more what you mean when you've said "...will always be with you in spirit".

Later :)

Veronica

Teresa said...

Paul,

I know these words may sound empty since so many people say them in these instances but I mean them from my heart. I'm sincerely sorry for the loss of your brother and the pain you've had to endure. I'm also here for you if you ever need me for someone to talk to or whatever.

I know we joke around a great deal but I do consider you my friend and I care about your wellbeing. Take care of yourself. Know that you will be in my thoughts.

Teresa

Rat said...

Thank you ladies. I know it's tough when you can't actually do anything to help someone who is apparently hurting inside but after 5 years, I've learned when I can deal with the memories and when I can't.

Sometimes I just indulge myself and rather than paste everyone with these occasions, I put them somewhere discreet like this where I can come back and add to the sum of everything he was.

On the other hand, I know some people for whom my brother's passing is real and immediate and I am so so blessed to have earned enough of their trust and confidence that they're happy to share their own thoughts with me on a regular basis.

Cham said...

*Smiles with sincerity and chocolate...*

I'm glad that you have the (emotional) strength to keep Chris' memory alive...and the ability and gift to share it with all of us who are reading your thoughts.